4 tips for social and servant leadership skills

Much attention in leadership focuses on the leader as an extraordinary hero. Management books often describe the leader as Superman or Superwoman. And the management team as The Fantastic Four, including the extraordinary powers and attributes. The person behind it is sometimes unrecognizable in these Uber heroes. How can you really become a better (servant) leader?

In the real world it’s different. There we find the director, entrepreneur and manager as an “ordinary hero”: with human qualities and strengths. But also with human limitations, frustrations and learning points. Moreover, in practice, Superheros do not appear to be very effective in leadership.

What is servant leadership?

Servant leadership seeks to direct the interaction between management and staff away from controlling activities to a synergistic relationship. The authority figure in servant leadership environments seeks to promote innovation, empower employees and ensure the well-being of those around them.

Servant leadership also aims to develop leadership qualities in others. This leadership style requires an individual to exhibit characteristics such as empathy, listening, stewardship and dedication to the personal growth of others. (source: Harvard Business School)

Leadership is a social process

In fact, leadership is not an attribute of you as a leader, but of your interaction with others. Servant leadership arises in the (social) process between you and your employees, customers, suppliers, colleagues (peers) and your own manager. You influence and are influenced in that process. Your leadership arises in situations (context and moment).

You are also more effective at leading when you understand and accept those situations. If you connect to the situation and shape new situations. If you use the process of getting and creating space. And if you use advancing insight. So you fill in leadership situationally (or not).

Therefore, one specific leadership type does not prove more successful than another in practice. Management books carry various leadership types, but do not provide a “formula” for personal, situational interpretation. But, It is no different …

Lead better? Stick to yourself

The contribution of yourself as an ordinary hero is decisive in the social process of leadership. Your role model behavior as a flesh-and-blood human being is your most important tool as a leader. With your experiences, your strengths, your limitations, your successes and your mistakes.

Even more than all the leadership theories put together, it is important to be yourself. And bringing leadership that aligns with that. Bringing this simply and authentically. Which is therefore effective and inspires others to also bring the best of themselves. It’s easier said than done!

Being yourself brings success, effectiveness, enjoyment and development. For yourself and for the people you work with. A wise person once said, “do what you love and you’ll never have to work.”

Another made of that, “do what you are and you enjoy and grow from working.” Maintain dialogue with others, but especially with yourself! As a result, become aware and develop yourself further. It provides you with better insight into your own strengths, capabilities, limitations and shadows. You become more effective when you know and can handle them.

Tips for developing social and servant leadership skills

1. Develop your ability to “sense” situations.
Through evaluation (or reflection) of past situations, you learn on two levels. First, to be more effective in similar situations in the future. Second, you increase your ability to properly sense the situation in the moment. In addition to reflection, it also helps you develop in the area of emotional intelligence.

2. Improve your awareness of yourself.
Take time to see what you are doing, but more importantly, why you are doing it. Many of our actions are based on unconscious conditioning, beliefs and patterns. Make them conscious. You become more effective when you know and can handle them.

3. Take advantage of obvious development opportunities.
Look around you. Every day offers opportunities. Take time to reflect more often on your own effectiveness in this social process. Spar more often with people around you. It will benefit you greatly, and you will become a better leader.

4. Use other contexts to develop your skills.
It is valuable to spar with people from other environments. It brings you other perspectives, stimulating questions and reflective comments. And provides you with unconventional and creative opportunities to grow in leadership.